


chances we took

by ShaneShenanigans



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Established Relationship, Hot Tub, M/M, Porn With Plot, jim is a dork
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-10 14:40:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15951437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShaneShenanigans/pseuds/ShaneShenanigans
Summary: Oswald jumps through hoops to make sure Jim doesn't find any new reasons to hate him and ruin whatever they have. Then he fucks up and is sure it's the end.





	chances we took

**Author's Note:**

> sO. this. is somethin. it can sort of go along with my fic 'whatever this is' though that wasn't the plan when i started, i sort of had it in mind by the end. you don't have to read it for this to make sense though.
> 
> good news!! the porn isn't a lie this time! it's here! it's real! it's raunchy! it's terribly written and all around bad!! enjoy!!!

Oswald _wasn’t_ nervous.

He pushed papers around on his desk, read the words at the tops of them, frown persisting as he continued to flip through page after page until the charade got old and he pressed his palms hard against his eyes.

He _didn’t_ care.

He tore his hands from his face and to his luck, an important document that he’d been meaning to look over had found its way to the top of the stack in his mindless shuffle. Just what he needed to occupy his mind. Picking it up between two fingers at the corner, he read a single sentence—

_To whom it may concern,_

_We’re pleased to approve your request—_

…the words blurred as his eyes and thoughts shifted elsewhere.

He closed his eyes, finally made himself admit he was, in fact, a little nervous.

It had been a mistake, after all. He’d long since decided to allow any necessary deliberate actions that may crack the foundation of their relationship, and stand by them. So far, no such actions had been necessary, and he’d been pleased to find tactics around them, many of which he’d adopted in remembrance of Falcone’s management style.

This was the first truly deplorable thing he was responsible for that had happened since it started. At least, as far as things that were sure to get out. Things that didn’t exist strictly within his own world, that didn’t threaten to impede upon the world any average citizen of Gotham lived in.

“Boss?” The voice from the doorway sent shivers down his spine. 

“Detective Gordon is here, asking for you.” The man wasn’t one of his more frequently present staff, and his voice betrayed no insinuation of assumption for the nature of their visit. Rumors of their relationship had spread high and low, and it was only a matter of time before the truth was revealed.

Until now, he’d been mulling over the need to discuss how to approach that dilemma. But now he was feeling sick to his stomach at the very thought of seeing the man.

“Send him up,” he managed keep the shake out of his voice.

_It had been a mistake._

They’d only showed up to scare him. Killing a man that owes you money may threaten the pay-up out of everyone else who does, but it also means you won’t get your money. Oswald had become very good at merely scaring people into paying him within the week, by whatever means were necessary.

He hadn’t realized how desperate Arnold Harris was when he’d placed himself at the lead of a house call.

It wasn’t just him. Two men, who were later identified as his brother and twenty-year-old nephew, had also been foolishly recruited to the cause. Kill Penguin’s men, make the debt seem more trouble than it was worth— that must’ve been their plan. It wasn’t that much money anyway, had Oswald not gone himself with extra man-power, it may have even worked.

Oswald never saw it coming-- he was foolish not to, but he'd been distracted. Now Harris and the family he’d had behind him were dead, along with two of his own men— but that didn’t bother him. What bothered him was that it ended up being an extremely public debacle, the gunfire drawing the attention of the press in ways Oswald couldn’t control in time. He had the right failsafes in place to remove evidence that would get him arrested.

But Jim would know. Hell, if Jim tried hard enough he likely could get him indicted on solid ground.

Arnold Harris was, aside from accepting the loan, an innocent man.

Jim would know that, too.

Would this be the end?

“Oswald.” Jim’s voice made his heart pound, and he raised his eyes to the doorway. He smiled with a resigned sort of sadness, but hoped Jim couldn’t tell.

“Jim!” He exclaimed to commence the pleasantries. Tto what do I owe the pleasure of this unusually early visit?” He made himself step out from behind his desk, approaching the man who’s face he couldn’t read. He didn’t look angry. But angry wasn’t what Oswald was afraid of Jim being.

_Despondent, discouraged, resigned to the inevitable…_

Jim released a sigh like he’d been holding his breath as he looked at Oswald, and shifted his weight rather awkwardly. 

“I wanted to see you.” He said, and Oswald blinked, some surprise at the lack of confrontation in Jim’s voice. It was as if Jim was the nervous one, not the one with damning evidence to ruin everything Oswald had tried uselessly to maintain between them.

Oswald’s face broke out in a smile half relieved and half uncertain and he laughed, “here I am…” he said, then swallowed as he stared at Jim, still in a desperate attempt to read his mind.

_Does he not know yet?_

Oswald froze when Jim stepped closer, trying not to give anything away as he searched his face for answers. None were revealed by his eyes, but there was something in the gentle hand that raised to his face, the knuckles that brushed over his cheek, down to the corner of his lips. It turned over, palm brushing against his jawline until Oswald found himself leaning into it, closing his eyes and losing himself in the comfort it gave him to have Jim touch him after how miserable with worry he’d been.

“Can we go somewhere?” Jim asked, voice strained, and Oswald’s eyes snapped open. Jim was looking him straight on, and certainly the request was suspicious but the way Jim’s hand gently cradled his face and the softness in his eyes was too comforting. Too much of what Oswald wanted, needed, and too much of what he feared he’d never have again.

“My work…” Oswald started to gesture to his desk, then stopped himself— “—can wait one evening,” he finished, nodding, and the corner of Jim’s lips twitched into a smile. Oswald felt himself immediately getting high on it.

“What did you have in mind?” Oswald asked.

o-o-o

A hotel out of town was the answer, was what he’d had in mind, and the insinuation sent thrills down Oswald’s spine. They spent a lot of nights alone together in Oswald’s room or Jim’s apartment, but it was always so secret, and there was only so much to do. Sex was far from a disappointment, but sex and room-service with hotel staff that definitely would not recognize them was much better.

“I love the idea and I’m glad we’ve both found the time for this sort of spontaneity, but please, let me pay—,”

“I knew you’d say that,” Jim interrupted, “and you’re too late. It’s already scheduled and paid for.” Jim shot him a crooked smile from the driver’s seat of his car, and Oswald’s brow furrowed in confusion.

“What if I’d said I couldn’t go?” Oswald asked in response to being informed that it was already paid for.

Jim snorted, like the question was absurd, “as if you could resist me.”

Oswald pressed his lips together to stop himself from laughing. Jim wasn’t wrong but the scenario was so improbable. He didn’t care if Jim could only afford something sub-par and there would probably be no after-hours spa included. The entire thing felt like some kind of dream.

Then he remembered Arnold Harris once again, and it started to fall apart in his mind. But, when he raised his eyes to Jim’s face and found his profile, looking plain, eyes on the road…

“Jim…” the name came on a breath. He wanted to confess.

“There’s a private hot tub,” Jim blurted with his own brand of anticipative glee, and Oswald’s attempt at words turned to an incoherent stutter.

o-o-o

After much back-and-forth, Oswald had convinced Jim to allow him to stop at the mansion and pick up some clothes and necessities, despite the fact that Jim had insisted it would only be one night. He’d also had the gull to throw in something about Oswald not needing clothes because it was fine if he just didn’t wear any.

Oswald could have smacked him, but the humor and playfulness were almost surefire signs that Jim didn’t know about the slip-up yet. Oswald had no idea how that could have been given that Jim had certainly been at work all day until now. Hell, it was a surprise he hadn’t accompanied his men to the crime scene himself. But if he was here now, pinching the underside of Oswald’s thigh as he got out of the car to pack his things, there was no way he knew.

Perhaps this was the universe’s way of giving him one more perfect night with this impossible man before it all went to hell when Jim inevitably made the discovery.He’d have to make the most of it. Then he would tell Jim himself, in the morning, and then deal with the consequences of not doing so sooner. Could Jim really expect better of him? He supposed it didn’t matter anymore.

He looked over himself once more, the vest and slacks he’d changed into with some attempt at presenting more casually and blending in. It was rare that he had such a desire while he was on top of the world, but he didn’t want to stick out like a sore thumb.

Once dressed and packed to his satisfaction, Oswald carried his own bag to the car to avoid drawing the curiosity of his men, and climbed back in.

“Finally. I was starting to worry you got lost in your own closet,” Jim said gruffly, and Oswald rolled his eyes as he threw his bag into the back seat.

“I don’t even have a walk-in,” Oswald said.

Jim considered. “You should,” he started the car and shifted the gears.

“Yes, I should,” Oswald whole-heartedly agreed.

o-o-o

Despite the hotel being outside Gotham, Oswald’s nerves managed to get the better of him as they walked in. He had no power here, no status, and while much of the world could have been made aware of his dirtier deeds with some research, for any common person he was no one. It felt freeing and odd at the same time, but mostly he just found himself convinced that everyone was looking at him.

He was sure the fact that Jim had insisted on linking their arms despite the stigma around two men being together in public didn’t help. Oswald had no problem with that, and in fact he may have insisted on the same. It simply surprised him that Jim was the one making these moves.

Check-In took mere seconds, Jim approached the front desk and said his name to the secretary. She smiled like she knew him and handed him his key, wishing him a nice stay. Or, both of them, in theory, but her eyes were locked with Jim’s.

“Thank you, and you have a wonderful night!” Oswald replied, all but leaning over the desk to draw her attention before Jim could reply. Jim prodded him, knowing exactly what he was doing as the woman sputtered out an uncertain but polite thank-you as they left.

“Unlike you to get jealous of random service workers,” Jim said, off-handedly in the elevator.

“I get nervous outside of Gotham,” Oswald muttered, tugging at his collar because it was hot in there. “But for your information I am absolutely the jealous type. The nerve of that woman, flirting with you while we’re obviously…” he trailed off, huffing.

“A couple?” Jim offered, tossing him a smirk and swaying slightly like he found the whole rant endearing. Oswald wasn’t sure what planet he was on but he wasn’t about to complain.

“Yes, that!” Oswald agreed, tightening his arm around Jim, who had the nerve to remain quietly amused while Oswald’s mind was concocting a nightmare where Jim left him tomorrow and took that secretary on a date and Oswald was left with no choice but to kill them bo—

—the elevator dinged, and he was able to breath.

“Are you sure this was a good idea?” Jim asked, genuinely concerned now.

“Yes. Sorry,” Oswald said, glad he was no longer stuck in a confined space. “I’ll be fine once we’re in private.”

o-o-o

The room was bigger than Oswald was expecting given Jim’s budget. He’d noticed that Jim had to have splurged the moment they’d pulled into the parkinglot and he’d seen the size of the place. Since then an even more now, as he took in the sight of a king-sized bed and a chandelier that was well-crafted enough to appear to be real crystal even if it was fake, he’d been trying to think of a way to ask Jim how much he’d spent.Once he found that information he’d find ways to discretely pay some of it back in gifts or dinner or—

“Is this okay?” Jim asked, seeming concerned as Oswald’s eyes shifted around the room.

Oswald took a deep breath, and met his eyes. “More than,” he nodded. “You mentioned a private hot tub?”

“Right!” Jim said, seeming excited. “It’s on the balcony. There’s a black curtain you can keep closed or pull back for a view of the city,” Jim crossed the room to head for the balcony, the door to which was massive. Oswald followed after him, definitely not without his own curiosity, and found himself smacked in the face with reality when he saw the cyan glow shining out from under the tub’s cover.

They may have established that there was more between them, and more to their relationship than just sex. But Oswald was just now realizing that despite admitted feelings, actions-wise, it still had been… well, just sex. They didn’t go on dates, plan getaways— hell they barely talked at all unless it was pillow talk. Oswald had made Jim dinner once when he’d left the precinct hungry, but only Jim had been eating. And even that had been eagerly cut short by a red scarf and one of Oswald’s many spare bedrooms.

And it wasn’t just the tub. When he turned around to look back inside, Jim was holding a room service menu and a phone.

“I’m starving. Let’s eat first, then we’ll do the hot tub thing?”

Oswald couldn’t do much more than smile and nod.

o-o-o-o

Oswald got in the tub first, and it was what he preferred. Climbing in was awkward, walking around shirtless was incredibly awkward, but sitting mostly submerged in water was something he could handle. 

It happened suddenly, after they’d eaten. Jim said he was going to use the bathroom, and Oswald saw his chance to avoid the humiliation of Jim witnessing any of the aforementioned awkward actions.

“Okay!” He’d called. “I’m going out to the balcony then. Get dressed and meet me there?” He’d managed a suggestive grin as Jim looked back over his shoulder and smiled, nodding.

It came together so seamlessly that he managed to ignore the fact that it was petty insecurities that drove him and feel rather proud of himself. He took off his father’s ring, set it on the side of the tub, and sighed as he sunk in and the warmth immediately calmed him. He could do this. As long as he didn’t think about Anthony Harris and his family, he could do this.

The mantra worked for a while, until it occurred to him that Jim seemed to be taking quite a long time to show. Oswald started becoming nervous, sloshing his hands around on the surface of the water to avoid wrapping his arms around himself.

He didn’t exactly do a lot of swimming or the like. He was lucky he even owned swim shorts and that the previously unused ones his mother had bought him years ago still fit. This wasn’t swimming but it still required him to be next-to naked. He wasn’t used to that unless he was surrounded by crumpled sheets and pillows and dim lighting, underneath a warm body.

Jim had seen him naked a hundred times in a hundred contexts and he didn’t know why this one was particularly unnerving. Perhaps it was just because they were expected to converse like this. Or perhaps Oswald’s guilt was still eating him alive and every insecurity he’d ever experienced had returned.

If it was the latter, he knew he had to push them down. Act natural, or Jim might suspect something earlier than Oswald wanted him to.

He ended up almost jumping at the sound of the sliding balcony door opening.

“Sorry I took so long. That secretary from the front desk knocked to check on us—,”

“What?” Oswald barked, nearly exploding out the tub but stopped himself when Jim started to laugh. 

A joke, of course. That idiot. How dare he make fun of him. And why was he acting this way?

“No, I just got caught up admiring how nice the bathroom is here. Have you seen it yet?” Jim asked as he approached.

Oswald shook his head as he felt an odd pull between the urge to look at Jim’s body and take it all in, casually looking him in the eye like he didn’t even _want_ to look at the rest of him, or averting his eyes completely.

In the end, he managed a deep breath, and let his eyes wonder, telling himself Jim wouldn’t mind. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen, but in this context it was. Jim looked like he was made for those swim shorts, made for this kind of situation. For walking half-naked toward a man who, in that moment, would have given the world just to touch his face or anywhere else and acting like he didn’t notice.

Oswald wanted to be in bed with him right that second, because he was suddenly certain he was yet to properly appreciate everything he was currently seeing.

Oswald told himself to calm down as Jim came close to the tub, stepped up one stair to get in and then stopped.

“Wait,” he said, “I forgot something.”

“Oh…?” Oswald’s voice followed him as he hurried back inside. Jim was certainly acting a little strange as a whole, but it was hardly a bad strange. He seemed uncharacteristically happy and Oswald had to wonder if, while he felt unwelcome and of place outside of Gotham, Jim felt some form of giddy and unchained. But that was silly, because were the case, why would he keep going back?

Regardless of what was making him act this way, Oswald hoped he’d be back soon so he could stop worrying Jim had suddenly changed his mind about everything and booked it back to the GCPD.

That worry came to a halt when, following the sound of the sliding door being shut, Jim appeared beside the tub holding one of the small hotel-provided tubes of body wash.

“What are you doing with that?” He immediately demanded, and then pointed hard at the list of rules, the fifth of wish was _‘No soap or shampoo in hot-tub.’_

“Relax,” Jim said. Oswald may have noticed Jim acting odd, but this was the first he started to consider that this Jim may have actually been an imposter.

“If they find out and I get fined, you’ll pay it,” Jim didn’t wait for Oswald’s protest before he turned the tube upside down, and started squeezing it into the tub next to one of the jets.

“Jim, no!” Oswald panicked as the amount of foam in the tub quickly increased from none to a ridiculous amount for it having been only ten seconds since the madness started. Oswald found himself being attacked by and overrun with foam as Jim climbed into the tub, laughing maniacally because he was a bastard.

“Why!?” Oswald demanded as he tried to manipulate them in a way that would keep them from swarming his body. Jim on the other hand seemed to be having a great time, scooping them up in his arms and blowing on them until they flitted through the air.

“It’s fun,” Jim insisted, blowing some in Oswald’s direction only to receive the glare of his lifetime. “Haven’t you ever had fun before?” He smirked, and Oswald’s face changed again, this time sarcastically expressionless at the absurdity of the question.

“I want you to know that this wasn’t the plan when I came here, but you’ve left me no choice.” Oswald said, smiling with his lips pursed and nodding with assurance. Jim looked back at him with an almost serious curiosity.

“Prepare to be drowned,” he lurched across the tub, through a mountain of bubbles to get his arm around Jim’s neck and hand on top of his head so he could press down on it. He was both irritated and pleased when Jim started to laugh, pushing his arm to keep it off him but fumbling to stay afloat as Oswald practically tried to climb on his head to make the dunk happen.

“Stop! You’re not supposed to go under the water in these things!” Jim begged, trying to raise a hand to point at rule number 3 on the sign.

“You’re not supposed to put soap in them either!” Oswald reminded, finally getting his elbow over Jim’s head an pressing down. He’d almost succeeded when Jim’s real strength appeared to come out, and practically picked him up out of the tub to get him to cease fire.

Oswald struggled, reaching down and scooping up a handful of foam to press it against the side of Jim’s face, who was taken by surprise and half-dropped Oswald back into the water. Oswald found his footing quickly, and quickly scooped up a massive armful of bubbles and threw it on Jim’s face.Jim stopped then, eyes and mouth shut tight to keep the soap out of them. Oswald sat back down, plenty proud of himself at having decommissioned Jim with his own tricks. He watched with pleasure as Jim scraped the bubbles from in front of his eyes and then wiped him off his mouth and the rest of his face.

“Feel better?” Jim asked Oswald at the sight of his proud grin and smugly crossed arms.

“Much,” Oswald nodded, and Jim threw a handful of suds at him half-heartedly. It didn’t reach him and just plopped on top of the pile that was rebuilding itself in front of him.

“You’re not really mad, are you?” Jim asked, and Oswald pursed his lips.

“No,” Oswald huffed, then his eyes shifted to the bubble mountain Jim had created. “Though, honestly I didn’t see that coming,” he gestured toward it. “Here, all this time, I thought you were an adult.”

Jim snorted a small laugh as he settled back into the water across the tub, glad Oswald was still just poking fun.

“And I guess I thought…” he started, but then stopped himself abruptly when he realized what he was going to say.

Jim frowned with interest. “Thought what?” He pressed, clearly concerned.

Oswald sighed, rolling his eyes at himself. “I guess I just thought this would all be a little more…” he trailed off again, then met Jim’s curious eyes and sighed, “…romantic.”

Jim seemed taken off guard by it and Oswald immediately regretted saying anything. It wasn’t like having stupid fun in a hot tub at a hotel wasn’t at all appealing, but…

But this could have been their last night together.

“Want me to get some candles?” Jim broke into Oswald’s thoughts with another joke and Oswald rolled his eyes again but also grinned at him.

“No,” Oswald said, sloshing the water around “I guess it’s good to know you’re this ridiculous,” he shrugged.

Jim laughed awkwardly.

“Still love me?” He asked, and Oswald’s face faltered, his mouth dropping open into a gape. Oswald had only told him that once, though he hadn’t exactly ever taken it back or given reason for Jim to think it had stopped. But it had been months, and Jim hadn’t said it back.

Jim seemed to notice his discomfort and immediately looked away, but with the black curtain surrounding them, there wasn’t really anything to look at.

“Yes,” Oswald caught himself, quickly, because of course it was the only right answer. “I do,” he nodded, looking directly into Jim’s eyes as they turned back to meet his. The smile was only a twitch at the edge of Jim’s lips but it came with warmth in his eyes and a soft brightness on the rest of his face.Oswald had been nervous about saying it but he smiled back at the warm reaction, though he couldn’t ignore the pang in his heart over the lack of response, it was small and he didn’t need feel the need to break their eye-contact.

That was, until Jim’s smile disappeared and his eyes widened, fixed on something behind Oswald.

“What?” Oswald asked, turning to follow his line of sight, but found nothing. He turned back to look Jim in his distressed eyes. “What is it?”

“Wasn’t your ring there?” Jim raised his dripping wet hand from the water as it pointed to the edge of the tub behind Oswald.

Oswald gasped, grasping the side of the tub with both hands and pulling himself over to look at the ground outside of it. He saw nothing on the tile floor.

“It must have fallen in!” He said, and Jim immediately smacked the button to stop the jets. Oswald let out a strained sound of distress when even though the jets were off, he couldn’t see through the bubbles. Every time he cleared a spot they floated back in within seconds.

“This is why they tell you not to put soap in here!” He shouted, shoving them out of the way frantically and splashing himself in the face on accident.

“Is this really why?” Jim asked critically and Oswald immediately glared at him, drops of water on his nose, forehead, and upper lip from recently splashing himself. It took a lot for Jim not to laugh, and he focused his attention on the water.

“Let me try and find it,” he said, and before Oswald could say another word, he’d sucked in a breath and disappeared beneath the surface of the water, and all the foam that plagued it.

Oswald stared at the hole in the suds where Jim had disappeared, waiting, anticipating, until he felt something brush his ankle under the water and his eyes moved down in front of him. He couldn’t see anything.

His pounding heart slowed when the first thing that surfaced was Jim’s hand. Or— his first finger and them, holding the ring between them as it emerged. It was quickly followed by Jim’s head, and his soaking wet hair and crown of bubbles that made him look absolutely ridiculous.Oswald didn’t have time to appreciate that the ring had been found, his face broke out into a smile, and he started to laugh.

“Wow,” Jim spit out the soapy water that lingered on his lips. “How’s that for a thank you?” He closed the ring in his hand to make sure he didn’t drop it because Oswald had failed to take it.

Oswald just kept laughing, and eventually leaned forward and blew a puff of air from his lips to topple the crown of bubbles on Jim’s head. Jim’s eyes shifted upward, and he couldn’t help grinning at the thought of how it must look. He used his free hand to push his hair back to regain some of his dignity, and picked up Oswald’s right hand.

Oswald spent a portion of the time Jim was fiddling with his fingers still too amused to question it. But when he did his smile was replaced with an gasp of a breath when he saw what Jim was doing. He was looking carefully at Oswald’s hand, holding it in his right while he held the ring in his left. Oswald stared, his heart pounding, as Jim slid the ring back onto his third finger where it belonged.

It took a bit longer than Oswald thought it should have, and he’d gotten thoroughly lost in the sight of it. It drown out the screaming that the association was fanciful and ridiculous and impossible, even if only for a few moments.

Once the ring was on securely, Jim released his hand, and Oswald pulled it back slowly, resting his hand on the side of the tub to keep it from being submerged again. His eyes flicked to Jim’s and found them looking intently back at him. It only took a moment for Oswald to get lost in them.

“I found something else under there,” Jim said, breaking the silence and whatever moment had been created.

“Oh?” Oswald was genuinely curious. Jim nodded as he sucked in a breath again, disappeared beneath the surface, and came back up a moment later.

“What is—,” Oswald started, but then stopped when Jim raised his own swim shorts above the surface of the water. Oswald gaped.Jim smirked.

Oswald splashed him directly in the face. “James Gordon! You are a grown man!”

Jim laughed, dropping the piece of clothing to hold up his hands in defense against the splashing. Oswald apparently wasn’t done, and in front of his warped-with-outrage face Oswald sent sloshes of water in his direction. Jim kept laughing and finally got a hold of Oswald’s wrists to stop the onslaught. Oswald struggled half-heartedly at first, but froze when Jim moved closer to pin Oswald’s arms against the sides of the tub.

It seemed to be in that moment that Oswald fully registered that Jim was naked under the water, and he couldn’t stop his eyes from flicking down. The suds were clearing up, but they still blocked his view. Still, the gesture mixed with the way his lips fell open and his breath started to pick up had certainly changed the mood.

Jim moved closer, and Oswald couldn’t budge. His hands were pinned, and he was too stuck in Jim’s goddamn big blue eyes to act on the urge to kiss him. So he waited to see what would be done with him.

Finally, Jim lowered himself, released Oswald’s wrists gently, and disappeared under the water once more. Oswald felt tugging at his swim bottoms a second later, and immediately lifted his hips, almost not of his own volition. He felt them pulled off in a graceful, swift tug and before he knew it, the ring was the only thing he was wearing.  
Jim resurfaced again and this time pushed his hair back almost immediately, moving his hips between Oswald’s legs and whispering his name against his lips. He grabbed the joint of Oswald’s waist and hip, and tugged him down so his cock slid under and then hard up agains his ass. He watched Oswald’s eyes widen, and grinned against his mouth, nipping at his bottom lip.

“You got hard fast…” Oswald was looking down. Jim moved his hand from Oswald’s hip and wrapped it around his cock instead.

Jim leaned past his face to his ear, “You’re mostly naked in a hot-tub, Oswald. I got hard a long time ago.”

He squeezed, and Oswald gasped, bucking up into the hand as it started to move up and down.

“Seems like you weren’t far behind,” Jim kissed his earlobe and Oswald whined, seeming to have a hard time making words. Jim loved that. Oswald was chatty, talkative and most memorably, he could use that clever tongue to get himself out of the most lethal situations. He’d done it multiple times in front of Jim, but under this kind of touch he was reduced to sexy, unbridled cries, high cracked moans, and incoherent babbling.

Above all else Jim couldn’t get enough of the sounds he made. When he was alone, they were what he missed the most.

Jim pressed down on Oswald’s hips with his fist, thrusting his hips up at the same time to press himself snug within the cleft of his ass. He moaned, and buried his face in the crook of Oswald’s neck, pressing his teeth against the skin of his collar and then turning his head to bite down gently.

“Harder,” Oswald’s voice came, and Jim’s eyes opened suddenly.

“What?” Jim pulled back slightly, twirling thumb pausing on the head of Oswald’s cock.

“I just… I meant…” Oswald sputtered. He closed his eyes, breathed in deeply, then opened them again, face redder than it had been just from the heat a moment ago.

“If you want to bite me harder, you can,” he said, in a small voice, eyes flicking up to Jim’s from under his thick eyelashes. 

Jim stared at him, swallowing hard as he tried to calm down because just Oswald saying that was irresistibly sexy.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Jim said, shaking his head and raising a hand to push some of the wet hair away from Oswald’s eyes. “It’s not like that.”

Oswald looked away again, seeming not quite disappointed, but perhaps embarrassed for having asked.

“Unless… you want me to…” Jim said, carefully.

Oswald sighed, a appreciative smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He didn’t know if he really wanted Jim to— he didn’t necessarily like pain. But he did know that he just wanted Jim to do what he wanted. He wanted so many things he hadn’t had yet that he couldn’t fit all into one night.

Smiling painfully at Jim, hoping the wet in his eyes could be passed off as steam from the tub, he shook his head back and fourth.

“Nevermind it,” he said, picking up Jim’s free hand and bringing it to his lips, kissing the tips as he held the forced smile tightly.

“You’re pruning,” He studied them as Jim’s concerned hand moved up from his cock to rub his hip and then belly.

Jim looked down at his own hand.

“We should move this into bed,” Oswald suggested.

“Shower first,” Jim said. “Chlorine, and all that.”

Oswald smirked, tilting his head and raising his brows. “You just like shower sex.”

Jim grinned back, “does you saying that mean I get shower sex?”

Oswald rolled his eyes, but his smile did stretch even further. Jim took that as a good sign.

o-o-o

Oswald wasn’t particularly heavy, but Jim was sure he’d gained some new muscle just from holding his body up against the smooth, slick shower wall to spare his leg. It was easier when they were facing each other with Oswald’s legs wrapped around his waist, but Jim preferred to see him from behind, spread him open so he could watch himself disappear into him against the porcelain background. Holding him up by the waist while Oswald pressed his cheek and chest hard against the tile, bracing his hands against it as Jim pounded into him directly under the spray.

When he got his fill of watching, Jim would lean forward, wrap his arms tightly around Oswald’s body and press himself as deep as he could go for a slower, more intimate fuck that gave Oswald a chance to breath rather than just scream.

It allowed Jim to bend his neck back and kiss his mouth, get his tongue between his teeth and tangle it up while Oswald’s soft moans sent vibrations through him.

“Oswald…” Jim said, voice hitching with every thrust, panting against his ear as his pace quickened again, “…god, Oswald, I love you, you feel so good.”

Oswald’s eyes flew open, his own arm against the tile the only thing in his line of sight as he continued to bounce his face and chest against it under the force of Jim’s rhythmic thrusts.

He didn’t even think Jim knew he said it.

Jim definitely didn’t know he was slowly killing him.

Sealing his eyes shut tightly, Oswald bowed his head, pressing the top of it against the wall now, trying to lose himself in the feeling of Jim’s cock against his prostate and his hand between his legs instead of the way the words made his heart feel heavy.

Jim leaned forward, lips against his ear. “Bed,” he said, “I want to finish you in bed.”

Oswald nodded quickly, glad to hear it. Showers were Jim’s favorite, silk sheets and fluffed pillows were Oswald’s. 

Jim coaxed him to turn his body around, maneuvering his legs carefully to wrap them around his waist as Oswald followed his lead. He slipped back in with ease, coaxing a slightly surprised gasp from Oswald who muffled it by covering his mouth with Jim’s, arms wrapped around his neck.

Once Jim had stepped out of the tub, Oswald strained his leg a little to pull himself up, and then dropped back down hard on Jim’s cock. Jim stopped in his tracks, his legs shook.

“Oswald,” he growled. Oswald rose up again, clenching his teeth through the way his leg ached under the pressure. It was worth it when he lowered himself again and Jim gasped and squeezed him tighter. Jim tried to walk, realizing clearly Oswald wasn’t going to make this any easier.

“Evil, remember?” Oswald said against his ear, and laughed with too much of a snort for Jim to consider evil anything but connivingly cute at the moment. Not to mention wrapped exquisitely tight around his cock and wiggling his hips around.

“Keep that up and I won’t make it to the bed. I got a place with silk sheets, you know.”

“You damn well better have,” Oswald scoffed, bouncing a himself in smaller amounts but more quickly down, “and you _will_ make it to the bed,” he spoke it like an order, and felt Jim’s arms tense and squeeze tighter around his waist.

“Yes sir.” Jim said, voice strained as he sped his pace, kicking open the bathroom door and nearly tripping over his own legs before pushing Oswald back onto the bed. The cover was still pulled up, and he knew that wasn’t what Oswald wanted to feel under his back.

Jim hurried to tug it down even while Oswald was on top of it to reveal the sheets, pulling at it and trying not to get distracted by Oswald’s cock bouncing when he lifted his hips and then feet to let it pass under him.

Wanting moan just at the sight, Jim crawled over Oswald, taking in with a breath the way his skin contrasted against the lavender colored sheets that the cover had revealed.

He kissed Oswald, soundly, and pulled his head back to look him in the eye. “What should I do now?”

He was glad when Oswald’s mouth slowly stretched into a devious grin.

Oswald leaned forward, speaking against his lips, “I’d love to draw this out, but I need you to finish fucking me into this mattress—,”

Jim moaned again at his words and tried to kiss him, but Oswald turned his head. “But Jim—,” he said, and Jim immediately opened his eyes again, looking into Oswald’s attentively. “Don’t come before I do.”

Jim grinned, nodded assuredly, and lined himself up as Oswald lay back, curling his fingers into the sheets to hold on. Jim took just a moment to admire the sight of his messed hair and impatient expression against the purple pillows, before he pressed in.

Oswald was still slick with lube, but slightly less so than before, so Jim made sure to take it slow at first. His ass seemed to quickly recall how to take him inside it, though, and in less than a moment Jim was balls-deep with his mouth against Oswald’s neck, biting down against his skin, a little harder than usual until he heard Oswald’s soft cry and immediately released him.

“That okay?” Jim asked, and Oswald’s reply was some blubbering and nodding, eyes sealed shut just as Jim wrapped his hand around Oswald’s cock once more. He ran his thumb over the head, when he felt the precum and smeared it over the head, then down his shaft before he started to move his hand up and down, timing his jerks with each thrust.

He could feel the vibration of liquid rushing up under the skin beneath his hand and as Oswald, moaned, Jim panted his name, “Oz, are you close?”

Oswald cried out in some form of reply— Jim knew he liked it when he called him that, but he also saved it for special occasions. Like to help tip him over the edge when he was nodding furiously to answer Jim’s question because he was unable to speak while Jim sped his pace in all regards, needing Oswald to come because he wasn’t going to last much longer but also because he was praying it would shoot up far enough to hit Oswald in the face.

He probably shouldn’t mention that to Oswald, but—

“Jim!” Oswald managed a coherent word just before Jim’s eyes flicked to the head of his cock and he thrust hard up into Jim’s hand, voice catching in his throat as it spurted up. Jim greedily tried to aim it at his face but Oswald’s muscles had tightened around him and were spasming and before he knew it he’d lost it too, pushing himself as deep as he could as he let go.

He cried out just as Oswald’s silent scream turned into a deep moan, hips jerking up into Jim’s hand that still loosely held him while they other gripped his hip for dear life.Oswald shut his eyes tightly, feeling tears prick at the corners of them, certain they were red but for Jim that was nothing new to see. Jim had seen all of him. He opened them, felt a tear start down over his cheek bone and leaned up, placing a hand on the side of Jim’s face just as he pulled out.

Jim was still on his way down, his eyes cloudy and searching around the features of Oswald’s face, perhaps for something to tether him. Finally they focused and locked with him, pupils dilating and head tilting slightly. Oswald stroked his thumb over Jim’s cheekbone.

“I didn’t say you could come inside me,” he said in a scratchy whisper, trying not to smile at the dumbstruck look on Jim’s face.

Jim just moaned deeply, like he’d barely heard the criticism and only registered the “come inside me” bit. Oswald laughed gently, tucking his hand underneath Jim’s jawline and coaxing his face closer.

“I wish I had on your face,” Jim admitted.

“Always next time,” he said out loud, maybe trying to make himself believe it. Instead it just hurt.

But Jim moaned again, this time half-way to a whine, and that made it feel a little further away, and then even moreso as Jim collapsed on top of him.

“I don’t want this to end,” Jim said, mouth smushed sideways against his chest.

Oswald’s breath caught in his throat, and he swallowed hard, gently stroking Jim’s half-wet hair, pushing it back the way he liked it.

“Neither do I,” he said, voice soft but strained, eyes taking in the side of Jim’s face lying against him as his heart fell into his gut.

o-o-o

Of course, when Jim said he didn’t want it to end, he meant their night of escape and sex and surprisingly competent room service, not their relationship. So it made sense that after about an hour spent ordering something to eat, getting ice, and getting dressed, Jim had fucked him face down into the mattress.

It had been quicker, raunchier from the get-go because Oswald was already loose, but ultimately a satisfying addition. Jim seemed to be on some sort of roll, like he was the one who thought this might be there last night together.

o-o-o

Oswald kicked Jim out of the shower the second time. He was trying to get actually clean this time, not a third ass-full of cum, and after he’d washed and shampooed himself Jim wouldn’t stop touching Oswald. So it was necessary that Oswald banished him.

Thankfully, he only seemed playfully offended as he left, sighing with over-dramatic disappointment as he dried off outside the curtain.

Oswald missed his presence almost the moment he left the bathroom. Standing under the spray, the little smile he didn’t even realize he’d been wearing slowly faded as his fears came back to haunt him. It made him wash his hair faster, rinse faster, the realization that right now he didn’t want to be alone.

He was glad he’d set his pajamas on the sink, and that Jim hadn’t gotten them soaked with the hurricane he that usually runs through the bathroom whenever he got out of a shower. He put them on quickly, and left the bathroom while still rubbing a towel against his hair.

Oswald was comforted by the sound of the television when he walked back to the bed, and looked up to find Jim relaxed with the controller in his hand. He sighed heavily, as if he couldn’t find anything good, and flipped it off. Then, he looked in Oswald’s direction.

“What are those?” Jim was frowning hard from the bed as Oswald approached it in his usual sleepwear— silk pajamas, because there could never be enough silk.

Oswald rolled his eyes as he crawled into the bed, Jim eagerly sliding close to wrap his arms around him despite his distaste.

“You know what they are,” Oswald said. He didn’t mind sleeping naked, but he’d brought pajamas and they were nice and he was going to wear them.

“They look great,” Jim kissed the back of his neck, “I hate them.”

Oswald scoffed, “Were you planning on making our double feature a triple?” He asked.

“Not unless you’re asking,” Jim mumbled. “I just like to wake up in the morning and be able to get my hands all over you.”

“Not just your hands…” Oswald said, Jim had his body practically plastered to Oswald’s from behind, one leg wrapped around the front of his calve, twisting them together.

“But really, Jim, don’t pretend you don’t enjoy everything that much more when it’s a challenge.”

Jim laughed, because he was right, and Oswald could feel his smiling lips against the back of his head. His heart started to pound, and he tensed.

“This is nice,” Jim sighed heavily, sounding plenty tired, but—

“There’s something I have to tell you…” Oswald said quickly, taking Jim’s hand that was thrown over his waist and wrapping his arm tighter around him. Maybe just so that if Jim tried to pull away in a moment Oswald could hold onto him, keep him.

“…I don’t know if I should tell you,” he said, confusion seeping into his formerly decided tone. “I don’t know if I should let you find out on your own and let myself imagine your disgust at the very thought of me. And then let you come to me and keep pretending this separation is going to work… I…”

Now he’d done it.

Jim hadn’t moved, aside from the hand Oswald had taken captive finding his opposite upper arm, and squeezing it. He didn’t speak for a while, and Oswald had revoked the privilege for himself because he’d already said all the wrong things.

“Is it Harris?” Jim murmured in a small voice, and Oswald’s eyes fell shut with anguish. He already knew.

“Of course it is.” Jim tugged his arm to signal that he wanted it freed, and Oswald released it immediately, allowing him to role over and put some distance between them, eyes fixing on the ceiling.

Oswald didn’t turn to face him. “If you already knew, then what is all this?”

Jim snorted, then sighed, which left Oswald even further confused.

“Some kind of grand finale?” Oswald asked, softly, certain that’s what it must have been and just waiting for Jim to reply.

“I didn’t expect any of this,” Jim said instead. Moments of silence passed, Oswald waiting on edge for more but unable to urge him along.

“I know how careful you’ve been to run things as cleanly as possible, Oz,” Jim said, and Oswald’s heart pounded at the continued use of the nickname. “I know how messy and violent your operations were before, I knew you were a loose cannon, I knew if this was happening I…” he cut himself off, and sighed, voice straining further, “…I knew I’d have to hear about all of it and then look you in the eye later and not hate you. That was the only way I could have you.”

Oswald was still facing away, but his eyes were wide with interest and he was trying his best not to let his increased breath rate give him away.

“I knew it would be the same for you, after all I’ve done, and the ways I’ve hurt you and—,”

“I don’t care about any of that,” Oswald interrupted, and Jim sighed.

“Look at me,” Jim said, and Oswald felt the bed shift as Jim turned on his side again. It took a moment, and Jim’s prodding gentle hand on his shoulder, but Oswald made himself turn over and look Jim in the eye.

“I know this is fucked up,” Jim said. “You know this is fucked up.”

Oswald’s eyes downcast at that, part of him wanting to protest but another part agreeing.

“But I also know how much you’ve been doing to keep things under control as cleanly as possible. Almost as lawfully as possible. And I know you did that for me.”

Oswald heaved a sigh, shaking his head. “It wasn’t _for_ you, it was just to make sure I could keep you—,”

“I wanted to tell you I love you,” Jim interrupted, and Oswald was thoroughly cut off. “Sorry it came out that way, in the shower— I got caught up in the moment. But I’ve thought about it a lot and I meant it.”

Oswald stared at him, mouth open, mind blank.

“That’s what this trip is,” Jim said. “More than anything else, that’s why I wanted you here with me,” he shrugged, lips twitching into a small smile.

Oswald couldn’t speak, so he did the only other thing he could think to do. He tucked his arms under Jim’s, tugged him close, and kissed him. Hard, inner lips strained against teeth, like he wanted to get stuck there and never let go. It almost hurt, until Jim’s hands were soft against his cheeks and he titled his head to make it simple. Not a lifeline, just a kiss, with the promise of plenty more to come.

Oswald’s heart couldn’t take much more melting, nor could his lungs last this long without breath, that had been stolen from him long before he pressed their lips together. He broke the kiss, breath heaving, and looked down at the small line of space between their bodies.

“Someday one of us is going to do something the other can’t forgive,” he said, seemingly unable to keep seeing his glass as half full. “It’s probably going to be me.”

Jim forced a painful smile when Oswald’s eyes met with his again.

“We’ll see,” he said, and once again kissed him quiet.

**Author's Note:**

> blargh blahg bloo. thanks for reading!!!


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